Thursday, 7 April 2016

Warzones: Spider-Island Review (Christos Gage, Paco Diaz)

Spider-Island is the Battleworld realm of the Spider Queen where she’s turned all its denizens into spiders – except for the resistance, led by Agent Venom/Flash Thompson. Venom discovers the heroes’ minds can be severed from the Queen’s if their bodies are transformed and sets about turning everyone he can into different monsters. Meet vampiric Captain Marvel, Lizard Hulk, and the glorious return of Cap Wolf! Elsewhere, Mayday Parker battles brainwashed Avengers to fill up space!

Yup, it’s another wanky Secret Wars tie-in! Seeing Venom battle the Spider-Queen is about as exciting as… well, reading any other Christos Gage comic! Predictable, flat, uninteresting, the whole thing is very boring and throwaway – I’ve never been an Agent Venom fan and this story didn’t do anything to win me over. I sort of enjoyed seeing the corny Cap Wolf (Captain America as a werewolf) again and Green Goblin Iron Man was ok but they’re very minor positives compared against the ocean of crap contained within these covers. 

There’s also a Spider-Verse backup featuring Mayday Parker, Peter’s daughter, as Spider-Girl who, get THIS, is trying to make everyone call her Spider-Woman now – AHAHAHAHAHA! Oh that bit never gets old, no matter how often it’s repeated. This story’s got a classic Marvel flavour to it, probably due to Sal Buscema’s art (80 years old and still going – gawd bless ol’ Sal!) but Tom DeFalco’s script helps, throwing character after character into the mix without bothering to establish much of a story beforehand. Maybe if you enjoy classic Marvel comics you’ll like this dull nonsense – I don’t and didn’t. 

Spider-Island = Garbage Island.

Warzones: Spider-Island

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