Sunday, 24 April 2016
Three Fingers by Rich Koslowski Review
Rich Koslowski’s Three Fingers is an alternate history of movie toons – characters like Mickey Mouse, Porky Pig, etc. all with their names changed of course – from the Golden Age of Hollywood presented as a documentary/talking heads-style comic. And it suuuuuuuuuuuuucks!
This is the book: familiar toon character – say, Foghorn Leghorn or Bugs Bunny – looks very aged and is usually hooked up to an iron lung or has a handler nearby because they’re so frail. They talk about how shitty the movie business is. Repeat for nearly 150 pages!
The alternate history goes that Dizzy Walters (Walt Disney) “met” Rickey Rat (Mickey Mouse) and the two made hit movies together. Other toons followed and tried to make it in the movie business with varying success. Stupidly believing the secret to Rickey’s success was his three fingers(!), toons underwent a surgical procedure “the Ritual” to cut off any extra fingers they had.
It’s such a garbage comic. Spotting the famous cartoon parody gets old real quick and the book has nothing to offer beyond that – even the concept of toons as real actors/people isn’t original, it’s just a rip-off of Who Framed Roger Rabbit? And what’s the point Koslowski’s making – that Hollywood is a fake, depressing place where people change their names, appearances and values to make it? Who’s this news to??
Three Fingers is a one-note story with the bare bones of some bad ideas tossed into it. The overall effect is unpleasant for unpleasantness’ sake. Horribly boring, give Three Fingers the finger.