Sunday, 27 March 2016

Warzones: A-Force Review (G. Willow Wilson, Jorge Molina)

Oh girl, I’m starting to think G. Willow Wilson’s only quality work is on Ms Marvel - first that Vixen crap at DC, now “A-Force”, a ‘90s-sounding lame superhero team? Though I suppose she only co-wrote this so some of the blame goes to Marguerite Bennett.

Welcome to feminist paradise Arcadia on Battleworld, policed by A-Force, an all-female superhero team led by She-Hulk. They do it right, not like dumb men! Then a series of disasters happen and She-Hulk’s leadership is challenged. Stuff is going on - what’s gonna happen next? Fart. 

This was terrible, guys. The story is bollocks: a shark attacks, portals appear, a cosmic being called Singularity’s flying around, it’s all part of some ridiculously abstract plan by the most obvious villain, not that any of it makes a lick of difference in the long run anyway. Also regardless of this being an all-female book, it’s still full of brainless punching scenes - sisters fighting sisters! Brilliant nuanced takes on the characters. I guess if women ruled the world it wouldn’t be that much better after all. 

There’s a sea surrounding Arcadia - and I’ll give the book this, Jorge Molina’s art is very good, this place is by far the most appealing-looking in all of Battleworld - and a giant wall enclosing it that gets punctured at one point but instead of the water rushing out, a weird rubbly path emerges in the middle of it that’s not very deep at all, allowing the threat to wander through. Ocean-level sea one minute, shallow pool mysteriously held back the next. No narrative consistency at all and I know Battleworld is a weird place but come on. It’s such a stupid scene that’s representative of the crap that is A-Force. 

I like a lot of these characters - Shulky, Ms America, Sister Grimm, and even Kamala Khan makes a brief appearance too - but they’re so badly written here. She-Hulk is bland, Nico is beyond annoying and everyone else comes off as completely one-dimensional. They’re female superheroes - that’s their characters! 

This Secret Wars tie-in was complete garbage. The A stands for Awful.

Warzones: A-Force

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