The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho Review

Santiago is a shepherd who has a dream to go to the Great Pyramids of Egypt and there find buried treasure! The mysterious alchemist will help him on his quest.

I’ve heard enough about Paulo Coelho’s bestselling novel The Alchemist for so long that I finally decided to see what it was about for myself, and, perhaps predictably for a novel that unironically sells itself as being about “following your dreams”, it was full of craptacular pseudo-spiritual New Age bullshit.

As a novel, it’s super-boring. Santiago bumbles along an uninspired journey, selling sheep, selling glassware, meeting some unremarkable people and, of course, finding his “treasure”. Nothing about it grabbed me. Worse still was Coelho’s horrible writing style which mimics religious parables that were always boring as fuck to read those few times I attempted to read the Bible as a kid.

What makes it worse is the lofty prose believes its imparting valuable wisdom to the reader:

“When someone makes a decision, he is really diving into a strong current that will carry him to places he had never dreamed of when he first made the decision.” (p.68)

And

“There is only one thing that makes a dream impossible to achieve: the fear of failure.” (p.143)

Both of which are true but so banal and obvious to note as to be worthless.

Other statements are just plain dumb:

“People need not fear the unknown if they are capable of achieving what they need and want.” (p.77)

So if they’re incapable of achieving what they need and want, they should legitimately be afraid? How reassuring! Also:

“Most people see the world as a threatening place, and, because they do, the world turns out, indeed, to be a threatening place.” (p.132)

Which follows a scene where Santiago and the alchemist are caught in a conflict between warring desert tribes! If they saw thousands of armed men fighting, would it still not have been a threatening place if they had thought it wasn’t??

Alongside these patronising and idiotic platitudes, the novel pushes patronising and idiotic ideas like magical thinking - believe that good things will happen and they will - while using labels like Personal Legend (your identity/goals) and Soul of the World (???).

I understand that a lot of this story is symbolic but Coelho really has nothing new to say. It’s the journey not the destination, love not money, etc. Really, that’s all you’ve got - this is what impresses so many readers?

Besides being stunned at the trite and vapid messaging, I was barely engaged by The Alchemist which was simply an unimaginative, tedious read through and through - about as profound as a fortune cookie and equally as forgettable.