The Gates of Death by Charlie Higson Review

You are a couple of old school game designers known for all things fantasy like creating Games Workshop. You want to revive your once popular role-playing game/book series, Fighting Fantasy. If you decide to hire the guy who played Swiss Toni on The Fast Show, turn to 143. If you…

Alright, you know what? Reviewing Charlie Higson’s The Gates of Death in the format it was written is not gonna work!

Ms. Marvel, Volume 8: Mecca Review (G. Willow Wilson, Marco Failla)

I suspected Trump’s election broke G. Willow Wilson’s brain in the last Ms Marvel book – now I’m convinced it has! Ms Marvel has jumped (Trumped?) the shark – Volume 8: Mecca is so pants, I’m abandoning this title.

Superman and the Legion of Super-Heroes Review (Geoff Johns, Gary Frank)

Life in the 31st century has gotten oddly grim – the Justice League has decided that Earth is for humans only and to deport all aliens because of some warped idea that Superman was human. So the Legion of Super-Heroes travels to the past to bring the real Superman back with them and prove that he was an alien. Apparently wikis don’t exist in the future!

Dragon Ball Super, Volume 3: Zero Mortals Plan Review (Akira Toriyama, Toyotaro)

Dragon Ball is a comic very close to my heart. I’ve loved it since I was a kid learning to read and was delighted to see it return recently for a new run with Dragon Ball Super. So believe me when I say I’m genuinely disappointed that this third book was absolute garbage. This Goku Black storyline is the worst one since that Android nonsense in DBZ!

My Favorite Thing Is Monsters by Emil Ferris Review

Comics don’t take that long to read. I’ve been reading Emil Ferris’ My Favorite Thing Is Monsters now for two weeks and I’m only 162 pages deep into this 397 page doorstopper. I can’t stand it anymore so I’m making an executive decision on behalf of my sanity – I’m well and truly done with this shit!

True Story by Michael Finkel Review

It’s fair to say that Michael Finkel had a pretty dramatic 2002. He went from being an award-winning journalist working at the prestigious New York Times to a publicly disgraced pariah whose career was suddenly in the shitter! How? In a story about child slavery on West African cocoa plantations, he had tried to pass off a composite character as a real person and got found out. Then, in a call from an Oregon paper that he assumed was about his scandalous breach of journalistic ethics, he was asked about the murders of a woman and three children committed by New York Times journalist Michael Finkel! Whaaaaaaat?!

Dark Days: The Road to Metal Review (Scott Snyder, Andy Kubert)

Magic metal has somehow been secretly guiding humanity for years apparently. And of course Batman knows about it. A war or something is coming. This is Dark Days: The Road to Metal aka Scott Snyder Does A Crappy Grant Morrison Impression!

You know a DC book is going to suck donkey balls if Hawkman sticks his beak in - and guess who’s beaking it up on page 1? Though, to be fair, this one is terrible even without the Hawkman elements (I gather that his Nth Metal armour is the “magic metal”).

Spider-Woman: Shifting Gears, Volume 2: Civil War II Review (Dennis Hopeless, Javier Rodriguez)

It’s usually fair to criticize an event for disrupting a series but, because there’s really nothing going on in Spider-Woman, Civil War II don’t disrupt dick so it’s a non-issue. Things are still the same: Jess has a kid, Porcupine is her assistant/sitter, Ben Urich is hanging around for reasons, and they just kinda bumble around. She fights Tiger Shark, then she’s fighting some Wendigos up north - if anything, Civil War II gives this title some purpose and direction!

Batman, Volume 5: Rules of Engagement Review (Tom King, Joelle Jones)

The Bat finally popped the question to the Cat and now they’re getting hitched. Which means Bruce has gotta do the banal things many single fathers do when they remarry: meet with the ex, have a talk with his kid about his new soon-to-be stepmother and break the happy news to his friends. But Bruce is not an ordinary person so these tasks inevitably involve taking on a small army of silent soldiers, breaking UN agreements and sword-fighting in the desert with a lunatic!

Here Be Monsters... 50 Days Adrift At Sea by Michael Finkel Review

Tokelau is a barely populated tiny New Zealand territory that seems like the kind of place young people would feel hemmed in by and want to escape. Which is exactly what three teenage boys tried to do a few years ago! They drank some vodka, decided to blow this boring popsicle stand and sail to Oz or somewhere - anywhere! - else in a relative’s stolen boat... and then they sobered up and realized they were lost at sea!

Event Leviathan #1 Review (Brian Michael Bendis, Alex Maleev)

Talia Al-Ghul and her gang of baddies, Leviathan, are up to no good again. After blowing up a Coast City building, leaving Steve Trevor the only survivor, it’s down to DC’s finest detectives – Batman, Lois Lane(?), Green Arrow(???), and The Question(!) – to find her and figure out where she’s planning to strike next, before it’s too late. 

The Hustler by Walter Tevis Review

“Fast” Eddie Felson, a brilliant young pool hustler, travels from California to Chicago to take on the best player in the country: Minnesota Fats. Will the young up and comer beat the old pro? Of course - there’s no story otherwise! 

Lodger Review (David Lapham, Maria Lapham)

A serial-killing travel blogger rents a room in some kid’s family’s house, destroys the family and, years later, the kid grows up looking for revenge on the blogger killer. 

David and Maria Lapham’s Lodger is basically Stray Bullets if Stray Bullets was crap! Lodger is a similar kind of dark crime story but not nearly as compelling as the material in Stray Bullets. 

Superman: Up in the Sky #1 Review

A random kid from Gotham is abducted by an alien and taken away - up in the sky. Superman to the rescue! But the universe is a big place - how will he find her? 

I’m such a big fan of Tom King’s Batman, I really wanted his Superman to be equally as brilliant - and it’s alright but also unfortunately not.